The art of dating in 2016

Learn The Art Of Dating Today!

Become a dating master and enjoy a better love life today! Find out about the new rules of dating.

What are the basics?

Step 1: Be yourself.

Step 2: Do whatever you want, as long as it doesn’t violate Step 1.

These are the basic rules of dating, but while this is a good guideline to follow when diving headfirst into the dating world, sometimes you need advice that’s a little more specific to your situation.


Who does the asking out?

Him. Or you. This question is rooted in a time when women waited patiently for a man to initiate a date. These days, though, it’s down to whoever gets the question in first. Still, you’ll find plenty of well-meaning snippets of advice suggesting 21st-century women stick to the 20th Century method of waiting for him to make the first move, lest you put the guy off by being “too forward”. However, do you really want to be with a guy whose ego is deflated by a girl asking him to meet her for a glass of wine?


And who foots the bill?

This dilemma is one of the hardest to negotiate, most probably because it is so loaded with power issues (if he pays, will he expect something in return?). A suggestion could be that whoever does the asking out does the paying, which means that you can suggest a restaurant or venue that suits your pocket. If this still doesn’t feel right and you’d prefer to pay for yourself, suggest splitting the bill straight down the middle.


What’s the new ‘dinner and a movie’?


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Your first date could well be an online chat, so there’s no reason your date has to follow any specific formula, as long as it allows for conversation. Consider a group date: it takes away the pressure of having to find one another fascinating for hours, plus it gives you an idea of what he’s like in his natural environment (i.e. around his friends).


Should I tell him I’m dating other guys?

If no one has made any pledges of devotion, both parties should know (and accept) that on evenings when the other is “busy”, “busy” might mean “eating sushi with someone else”. So if you’re casually going on dates with several different men, without any talk of mutual exclusivity, there’s no real obligation to let each one know that there are others.  


What about dating a colleague?

Many companies explicitly state in their HR rules that dating a co-worker is a no-no. If this is the case, it’s a rash idea to risk your career in order to go on a date. But if no such rule exists, you’re under no obligation to inform your boss if you and a colleague go for dinner. If things move towards something a little more serious, then it’s a good idea to mention it to your manager (even if you’re not obliged to). By bringing it up first (instead of being ‘caught out’ by someone from the office), you get to make your case and show that your out-of-office relationship won’t affect your work performance.


Should I break things off face to face?

You’ve been on a date or three, but it’s clear that you’ve got no interest in taking things any further, what now? Take cues from your relationship (however brief): if you communicated mostly via email and text then an email ending things really is acceptable. If you’ve chatted on the phone, then give him a call. And if he’s part of your broader circle of friends and you’re still going to have to see him every now and then, it’s best to break things off in person.

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